Showing posts with label college. Show all posts
Showing posts with label college. Show all posts

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Response to "On Alcohol and Student Affairs"

I spent my evening at two different programs that were going on in my residential area, but I was just spending some time unwinding by scrolling through Facebook afterward. Something jumped out at me as I went down the page. Two colleagues of mine had shared the same article. Of course this happens frequently, but it wasn't the usual new article. They were sharing a blog post written by another colleague, Becki Elkins entitled "On Alcohol and Student Affairs". It's a great personal story, but raised a lot of really good questions/points. I don't want to make this about my story, as I think Becki needs to be recognized for her strength in sharing this with us, but my response is a bit more personal.

See, I love this. I love what Becki wrote. I love what Becki shared. I don't think I love it for the same reasons that most others do, and that's fine. I love this because it brings light to an issue we seem to be blind to. Do we really need to host socials at bars? Do we need to have every event circulated around an alcoholic beverage? Why is there such a need to 'unwind' with a glass of wine or beer? Sure if you truly think that helps or works for you - more power to you. I just don't think it's needed. I haven't been to a national conference, but I don't believe my understanding of the social aspects is entirely wrong. There is a lot of drinking that happens there. Of course, there are a lot of people and most know their limits, but there are some who are overdue for a vacation and get carried away. How does this help us when bartenders, waiters, hotel staff witness this side? Yes, I know it's not everyone but it is still happening in our field. What do we do? How can we help those who need it?

I was at a bad place in my life early on in my career and used alcohol as a crutch. Taking a depressant while depressed doesn't do any good. I knew that from all of my training and educational courses, but I didn't care. I knew enough to drink at the right times and in the right locations, but I did indulge more than I should've. That lasted for at least a year. Then one day I just stopped. I decided that I was worth more than I was giving myself credit for and wanted to be able to do better for myself. I haven't had a drink since October 31, 2010. Sometimes I do want a drink. I know I could handle it. I wouldn't buy any to take home, but out to dinner or at a bar I could have a drink. I could do it. I would be okay.

Just as I thought about trying a drink again I was diagnosed with liver disease. I'm never allowed to drink again. Do you know how hard it is to get to know new people or make plans at a new job when everyone else wants to go to a bar? Sure, I can go. Sure I can drink something else. However, do you know how many times people ask me why I'm not drinking? Why does it matter? Why do we care so much about another's choice or reason? It's so much easier for me to just stay by myself than connect with others because I don't want to have to explain my story. I don't want to have to continue to let everyone know. They don't need to know. They don't need to ask, but they do. They always do.

So I ask:

  • How do we support the people who fight these battles?
  • What can we do to help?



I'd like to send a personal message to Becki - no, you are not alone. I may not need to attend meetings and I may not struggle with this addiction, but you are not alone. If we are ever at the same conference I will go to a meeting with you. I hate mornings, but I will be there with you because we all need more people working with us. 


Authenticity.
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Tuesday, March 18, 2014

NASPA 2014 - A Virtual Experience

I had grand plans this year. I wanted it to be the first time I attended a national conference. Seeing as NASPA was in Baltimore, MD I thought I would have a better chance going there, but as my luck would have it that didn't work out. I then found out about the groundbreaking NASPA Virtual Conference that they were going to roll out this year. My love of technology, student affairs, professional development, and being an introvert - this seemed like it would be perfect!

I had a lot of questions leading up to the conference, but thankful to the NASPA staff and NASPA TKC volunteers (got it right this time!) for answering them all for me. One of the major items I needed to know was if I could view session after they aired. I had to participate in a few GA phone interviews on both Monday and Tuesday which would make me miss a few sessions. I was happy to find out that we would be able to review sessions.

So how exactly did it go? Well here's a short timeline, as it was only a three day experience anyway.

Day One: NASPA 2014

The Opening Session started with a great ceremony on Sunday, March 16, 2014 at 5:00pm. It was a very entertaining opening with multiple performances. After performances the featured speaker Wes Moore spoke. I enjoyed his story and what he brought to the table. One of the statements, that most people ended up tweeting, was about how just getting a degree doesn't matter unless you have experiences to back it up and know why you got it. Overall I found very energized from seeing the Opening Session and was ready for Day 2.

What I learned/enjoyed from Day 1:

  • I didn't have to worry about the Baltimore snow storm as I was cozy sitting on my couch.
  • Two other professionals I had connected with through Twitter were also participating in the virtual conference (Lynn Ellison and Jennifer Keegin)
  • NASPA TKC volunteers are very knowledgeable and great to work with. Thanks to all of them!
  • This was the largest NASPA conference with about 6000 on site attendees and 120 participating in the virtual experience.

Some good tweets that were shared (yep, I included one of my own):

I absolutely love this. #aaws14 pic.twitter.com/cHI2DHq2Fs 
— Amma Marfo (@ammamarfo) March 16, 2014 

You can also check out the NASPA blog post for Baltimore Journal Day One.


NASPA 2014 - Day One: Opening Session

Day Two: NASPA 2014 (on location)

Today I had to participate in some GA phone interviews from the Campus Living Office. I was up at 7:00 a.m. so I could get ready, drive to our North campus, and set up shop to be able to tune into the conference when it started. I arrived on North Campus before the office was open and ended up sitting in the Housing Operations Office across the hall. The day started of with a Featured Speaker Session. Debra Humphreys spoke about student success and learning. I also attended these sessions for day two (missing one):
  1. Beyond the ADA: Inclusive Policy and Practice for Students with Disabilities in Higher Education
  2. Featured Speaker - Freeman Hrabowski, President, University of Maryland - Baltimore County
  3. Higher Education Act reauthorization: What it means to public universities and student affairs
  4. Ready to Face the Media: Strategies to Employ During Crisis
  5. 5 More Things: A Dialogue on Supporting Postsecondary Success for Men of Color

What I learned/enjoyed from Day 2:

  • SA folk REALLY like their coffee. Long lines at the Starbucks in Baltimore. 
    • I had no issues with my Keurig at home.
  • Following the back channel on Twitter allowed for me to check out sessions not available in the virtual format.
  • There are some REALLY great and talented professionals in our field. I'm more and more amazed by what others have done and are doing.
  • The Live Chat in sessions for virtual attendees added to the session. Lots of good ideas and information was shared there too.
  • Live-in professional staff members at private OR public institutions are covered by the ADA for service animals. How does your institution measure up?
  • HUD 504 doesn't differentiate between live-in staff & students when it comes to comfort animals.
  • I met a new professional during the Q&A panel discussion. Hello AJ Duxbury!
  • One of my mentors (Shigeo Iwamiya) still amazes me.
  • On site attendees really love Jimmy Johns = extra long lines during lunch.
    • Not an issue in my kitchen.
  • NASPA's "5 Things" report can be found here.
  • I felt very comfortable during my virtual conference experience - my 'I' was fully charged and raring to go!
  • There were little to no issues with being a virtual attendee. Some great suggestions on improvements were shared and I'm actually excited to see what happens for next year.

Some good tweets (yes a lot are mine):

You can also check out the NASPA blog post for Baltimore Journal Day Two.

Added a jacket too!
Bringing a little St. Patrick's Day style to NASPA virtual Experience

NASPA 2014 - Day Two: On location [UB North Campus Housing Operations/Campus Living Offices]

Day Two: NASPA 2014 Pj's to Business attire

I woke up late thinking I had missed the first session and realized that it didn't actually start until 8:45. I also missed the two afternoon sessions because I had to travel again for a GA phone interview. However, I was not disappointed in today's sessions. I thought I had a favorite session today, but as I sit here typing this I realized that it's harder to choose one then I thought. I would say that I really enjoyed the session on Title IX because it's an area I want to develop in more. It was nice hearing about Veteran's Affairs because I had quite a bit of experience with veterans at my previous institution. I enjoyed the panel discussion on graduate programs. Being one who didn't attend a traditional program it was nice to hear them discuss distant learning and online programs. "Climbing the Ladder to CHO/SSAO" was a good session to bring things into perspective. As I am in the process on mapping out my next career move, this session gave me a lot to think about. The official session titles of the day are as follows (again I am missing two):
  • So You Want to Be the Boss--Climbing the Ladder to CHO/SSAO
  • The Future of Title IX: How your campus should prepare for the inclusion of gender identity and expression
  • Building supportive student veteran communities on college and university campuses: Innovative and effective strategies that work
  • Featured Panel - The Future of Student Affairs Graduate Preparation Program with Larry Roper and Patricia Whitely as moderators

What I learned/enjoyed from Day 3:

  • "Having a veterans office isn't enough. Knowledge should be in offices across campus: Admissions, Res Life, etc" 
  • When a student identifies as a veteran, they shouldn't be pushed right to the veteran affairs office. LISTEN to their question 1st.
  • There isn't a ladder, it's a lattice - you can move up or across.
  • As you move up, it's important to look in. Why do you want to move up? Why do you stay in the field?" Shana Meyer
  • In the next decade 2 million veterans will be entering colleges and universities."
  • "If you don't have a mentor now is the time to DEVELOP one.Best way to develop one is w/ someone you know & trust." Shana Meyer
  • "Fears,Successes, Questions" CHO-SSAO #NASPA14 pic.twitter.com/cUuLYjs2JY
  • For trans* residents: Private spaces cannot be the ONLY option & it should not cost more/burden them
  • If a trans* male student wants to join a Fraternity, he needs to be allowed because he identifies as male. This is the same for a trans* female who wants to join a sorority.
  • "What does success look like? Sometimes it's just getting people in the room."

Some good tweets that were shared:


You can also check out the NASPA blog post for Baltimore Journal Day Three.


NASPA 2014 - Day Three: PJs on the couch

And then to North Campus for a GA Phone Interview
Business attire acquired.


Overall thoughts on this experience

I do believe that this virtual conference option was FANTASTIC! It allowed a lot of professionals to attend the conference and participate through a more cost friendly option. Today while in sessions and participating in the Live Chats I saw a lot of people who were watching with colleagues or full offices. This really does open up the possibility for so many more professionals to get the information than ever before. I also enjoyed being able to attend a session and follow other sessions on the back channel through Twitter. However, I did feel that I was not able to tweet as much as I normally do while at conferences or presentations. Though I am not too upset about this as I was able to screen shot slides during sessions and share them. I believe that was more beneficial. Would I want to change things? Yes. NASPA and the Technology Knowledge Community did a fantastic job pulling this all together, I do believe some things can be improved for next year and for years to come. Some of the issues that need to be addressed are as follows:
  • Seeing people logged in is great, but not being able to see if they are active in the Networking Lounge (chat) or the session you are currently in doesn't work. If I knew who was in the sessions with me I would have talked to them more and been able to network during the conference. I met two new people, plus some of the TKC volunteers.
  • Session options. There was a variety of sessions available to the virtual audience, but if we could choose from a larger pool I think that would be great. I know not every session can be part of the virtual conference, but I feel that it would've been nice to have more options. For the most part there was just one session during each time slot to participate in. The only time it was doubled up was when there was a featured speaker or panel.
  • Hybrid registration. An option to attend both onsite and virtually. Yes, this may not be a hot commodity,but you never know how many people would choose this option it it was available. I sense a poll coming on...
  • [UPDATE 3/19/14] Questions. One of the only problems I feel that we ran into being a part of the virtual conference was that when it came time for questions at the end of a session we usually didn't have time to have ours asked/answered. Our questions were screened before being able to be presented to the panel/speaker. A lot of onsite people stood up during questions time and just made comments. Granted they were good, it just took time away for us who didn't have a chance to later speak with the presenters onsite.
    • Screen onsite questions to make sure it's a question before allowing them to speak. (Sounds harsh, but it serves a purpose!)
    • Manage the time better during the presentation; maybe a 5-10 minute warning light for questions to start and then the red over limit light?
    • Have the TKC volunteer go first to ask the questions from the virtual audience before onsite people have a chance.
And there you have it. See, not really too much to change! I do believe that if I make it to NASPA15 I may even register for the virtual conference too (see Hybrid registration above). Why? Because I think you get the best of both worlds! As a virtual conference attendee we have access to the materials for 30 days! How many times can I watch the videos, share with colleagues, and have discussions on my campus in 30 days? I'm thinking a lot. It also allows for more opportunities to go to different onsite sessions if you know you can catch one virtually later. Just my thoughts on the matter. :) 

Here's to next year: NASPA 2015 in New Orleans, LA

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Location: Buffalo, NY, USA

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Supervision: A Work in Progress

I have supervised many staffs in my career as a Residence Life and Housing Professional. I have supervised various size staffs, staffs with different strengths and weaknesses, and even staffs from various institutional settings. I have learned a lot in these experiences. However, one of the areas in which I had no supervision experience was when it came to graduate students or professional staff. I knew that in my next position I needed to look at jobs that would give me the experience to supervise either a graduate student or a professional staff member in order to be able to advance in my career. I did it. In my current position I supervise a part-time professional staff member (Assistant Hall Director) and we co-supervise the paraprofessional staff. It was a hard transition. I believe I have managed to execute the dual roles well, but am never quite sure I am doing enough. After all, my goal is to be in a mid-level management role within the next few years.

Over the holiday break I reflected on this a lot. Probably more than anyone else would have, as it was the holidays and who wants to think about work constantly? However, I actually got excited about it. The more I reflected, the more I was able to create a plan of action for the upcoming semester. I didn't exactly think I hit it out of the park in my first semester with new supervisory expectations, but I was not completely sure I was doing that well either.

At the beginning of this week while in my office, that I actually share with my AHD, she asked if I had a to-do list for her. I was still climbing out of the mound of voicemails and e-mails I needed to respond to so at the time I had to say no. Though I knew that I would be out of the office for a few days attending a mini conference and a training session so I didn't ignore her request. I sat down and came up with a very short to-do list. The following is the small list that I had come up with.
Please work on the following tasks:
·         A list of 5 professional goals you want to accomplish this semester.
·         A strategy for adjudicating judicial hearings in a two week time period (letters, meetings, sanctions issued).
·         Choose 5 items from the Professional Growth and Development Checklist to complete this semester. (attached)
·         Create a list of things that you would like to discuss or do with the RAs this semester.
·         Create a list of areas you need me to improve on as a supervisor.
·         Start work on your position binder.
These can be works in progress but some things that I’d like to see you thinking about.

I knew that if I wanted to get better I needed to know exactly what areas of my supervision I was lacking. I have asked my paraprofessional staff this throughout the semester in their one-on-one meetings with me. I did get useful feedback from a few of them, but most had nothing to say. During my self-reflection I decided I needed to ask the question that most people find difficult to do; I needed to ask for feedback from my AHD. So I did. (I also asked about her because I want to make sure that we focus on a few more professional development items for her this semester.)

Today I attended a mid-level management training that was newly developed in our department this year. We had some Student Affairs professionals from other institutions come present on mid-level management topics, and we also invited some professionals from our campus to speak during a round table. One of the pieces of advice that was given during the round table was to elicit feedback from your staff. I must admit, I was quite proud of myself for already being on top of that. However, I had not received the feedback yet. I had a conversation with one of the Associate Director's in my department after the training had ended and mentioned that I had done this. After the training ended I stopped in my office to do some follow-up on a few items because I had been out of the office for the day. I was pleasantly surprised to see that my AHD had completed some items on the to-do list and sent me her feedback in an e-mail.
Supervisor Areas of Improvement:I really just sat here for an hour thinking about this and I can’t really think of anything you need to improve on. You’re very supportive with my job search and active in helping me prepare for it. You communicate with me about staff and resident issues in a timely manner. You provide constructive feedback when necessary, send me opportunities for professional development and growth, support my mental health concerns, and acknowledge that I’m a student first. I think if there’s one area you need to improve in, it’s getting out of the office before 11pm every night!  

I read that and can't help but be happy. Apparently, I’m doing better than I thought I was; not that I thought I was doing poorly, but it’s better to know than continue to disservice someone else. I’m going to incorporate asking for feedback into my one on one’s with her at least monthly. Supervision is the one area in which I have felt I could use/needed growth at the start of this year, and I'm not going to completely dismiss improving on it entirely. So, why is this important? Well, how many of you seek feedback other than during times of evaluations? I do think people are uncomfortable with the idea of asking and yes sometimes being asked for feedback is too, but how will we ever improve if we don't? I'm refocused and re-energized for the semester to begin. I feel like I've created a new outlook and am optimistic about where this will lead. I encourage others to let go of the fear - you never know until you ask.

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Location: Buffalo, NY, USA

Monday, November 18, 2013

This means something to me.

An expectation of my current position is that my colleagues and I create multiple programs each semester based on diversity, sustainability, and community service. Last week I was the lead on an immersion program that focused on diversity; an adaptation of Archie Bunker's Neighborhood. It was actually a great success. We are also working on an event to bring awareness to Hunger and Homelessness by trying to plan a "One Night Without a Home" event at the end of National Hunger and Homelessness Awareness Week. I brought this idea forward. I was excited to get the chance to work on something like this again, as I had supported Resident Assistants at University of Pittsburgh-Greensburg when I was working there as a Graduate Resident Director. When I was at Pitt-Greensburg we didn't orchestrate a large event like "One Night Without a Home", but it's something that I've always been interested in trying to make happen.

This is something that I was working on. This is something that I wanted to happen. During some of the planning meetings with my colleagues were trying to decide how this program was going to work, what we were going to provide, what students could bring. I wanted to try to be as realistic as possible. I didn't want students to bring cell phones. I didn't want students to bring ipods/radios/etc. I didn't want to really allow for too many amenities that take away from the experience. I got resistance. We're in Buffalo, NY in November.  I get it. We need to think about the safety of the students. I get it. I'm not trying to hurt anyone, but I would like them to have an experience to think about. I don't like fluff. I don't like glossing over hard topics. This means something to me.

Sitting in the planning meetings it was hard to not speak up. It was difficult to just nod my head and wave the white flag. I wasn't ready to share. I didn't want to share. I didn't want to go into the details right then, right there. I get it now. I thought about how the last planning meeting went and what I was holding back from saying. I get it now. I understand why this means something to me.

I was homeless.
I was homeless.
I was homeless.

January 19, 1996 a flood devastated my town. Just two years prior my town was also struck by disaster; another flood, one in which I almost lost my life, but that's a whole other story. January 19, 1996, this date is stuck in my brain. Throughout the flood my family and I were in our house; second floor duplex. I watched our car that was parked out front get swept by our house. I watched our brick garage collapse. I watched other people's belongings go down stream. I watched my town become a raging river. These are things I remember vividly. We stayed in our home until the water subsided later into the evening. We were rescued by neighbors who drove a backhoe to our front porch and scooped us to safety. We had nowhere to go. We were homeless. We were renting our home from the church we belonged to. We had been renting the same house since 1987. I don't recall the details but one of the jobs my Mom had was as a cook for the only restaurant in town. The owner and my Mom's boss allowed us to move into a room on her second floor. A family from our church who owed a very large house allowed us to keep belongings that we didn't lose in their basement. For 9 months my mother, my sister, and myself lived in a single room. We shared one full size bed, one in which I would usually get kicked out of and slept on the floor because I moved and kicked in my sleep too much. For 9 months we lived in a single room. I was lucky that I was in school because I could count on getting a meal. I was lucky that sometimes my school bus would arrive at school early enough so that I could eat breakfast, these days I loved. For 9 months most of my dinners were made of peanut butter and jelly on saltines. Our luck changed slightly. We were still homeless, but we seemed to be moving up in the world. The family that owned the backhoe had an unfinished basement that wasn't really being used, we were welcomed in their space so we had a little more room. We moved our belongings we had with us from the single room above the restaurant that my mother worked in to an unfinished basement in the home of family friends. We were still homeless. The family had a pull out couch in the basement. My mother and sister slept on the couch, I slept on the couch cushions on the concrete floor. We were homeless, but we at least felt like we had a place to call home for now. For another 9 months we were homeless. My mother worked 3-4 jobs during this time to try and support us to find a new place to live. We were homeless for a total of 18 months. Things didn't automatically get better. With all that my mother was able to save we purchased an old 1960's trailer. During the time that we owned the trailer the back half of the electrical system went and to get power into the master bedroom, which my sister and I shared, we had to run industrial extension cord. This is how we got power to the bathroom too. During the time we owned that home anytime it rained we would have a waterfall in the middle of our living room. This home wasn't perfect. It's not what most people would call a home, but it was ours and we made it the best we could.

This program isn't to be a mockery. This program is to bring awareness. We hoped to educate students. I hoped to get them thinking about what some people go through. I want to challenge them. I want to see how this makes them feel. I want to see their thought process. I want it to me something to them because this means something to me.

I'm asking too much.



National Hunger and Homelessness Awareness Week is November 16-24
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Location: Buffalo, NY, USA

Friday, November 8, 2013

How big is your influence? [Non-SA post]

Well I qualified again! Sometimes it's the little things that make the biggest of differences. I had a friend join Influenster a while back and I kept seeing all the fun she was having with her Vox Boxes. She was kind enough to invite me to join and I've been very pleased. [If you would like more information on Influenster, please visit their website (linked above).]

Long story short, this is the second Vox Box I have qualified for. I received the Mary Kay box earlier this year, but I didn't blog about it. I just posted on all of my other Social Media outlets. I decided to blog about this one because I think the items included in this box work well in my professional life.

A break down of the items:
(If you want to follow other's views on these items feel free to search the companies on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Vine, etc.)
ProductBrand FacebookHandle / Hashtag
belVita crunch Breakfast BiscuitsbelVita@belVita / #BreakfastBiscuits
Dr. Scholl's For Her Cozy CushionsDr. Scholl's For Her#DrScholls
Kiss Gradation PolishesKiss Nails@KissProducts / #KissNailArt
Rimmel London Scandaleyes Retro Glam MascaraRimmel London US@RimmelLondonUS / #retromania
Vitabath Hydrating LotionVitabath@Vitabath / #FallingforVitabath
Lindt LINDOR Milk Chocolate TrufflesLindt Chocolate@Lindt_Chocolate / TBA


Here are my reviews:
  • belVita crunch Breakfast Biscuits - I received the blueberry biscuits. I had been skeptical on them before and of course didn't want to buy them in the event that I wouldn't like them. I was happy to test them out though. They were good. They're crunchy, so it felt like I was eating a cookie. The blueberries are a bit chewy though and can get caught in your teeth. Overall I'd recommend them and am actually interested in seeing what other flavors they have.
Maybe Wheaties is no longer the breakfast of champions?
  • Dr. School's For Her Cozy Cushions - Perfect! These cozy cushions add warm and comfort to tough shoes. Have a favorite pair of winter boots that you just can't get rid of yet? Pick up a pair of these and they'll feel like new! I tried them in a pair of flats that used to be lined, but after wearing them the lining is no longer fluffy. I would recommend that these are better for boots, but what better way to add year round functionality to some of your favorite spring shoes?
  • Kiss Gradation Polishes - I was skeptical of this at first. I had to wait a little for my nails to grow out, because I didn't think I'd be able to do it with short nails. It was easier than I had thought it would be. I've read reviews and there were a lot of complaints about the dry time. I don't know, but I had no issues with my nails drying quickly. I put on the base coat, let it dry, added the second coat (which I could've done better with the amount of nail I covered here), and then added the third coat. I thought my nails didn't come out too bad. I don't know if it's something that I would want to do often, but once in awhile it's nice to have something different.

  • Rimmel London Scandaleyes Retro Glam Mascara - I'm not one for make-up. I actually tried mascara for the first time this past spring. I didn't particularly like it. My eye lashes would stick together when I blinked. It was annoying. This made me very hesitant about trying this product. However, I am glad that I had the opportunity to do so. I found that this mascara was not sticky and/or dried quickly. I also didn't have to apply many coats for it to show. I actually had fun trying out different ways to wear this - thick, not so thick, by itself, with full eye make-up. It's a great product and I am actually looking forward to seeing what else I can do with it. 
"Are you wearing fake lashes?"
  • Lindt LINDOR Milk Chocolate Truffles - I'm born and raised Pennsylvania girl. Chocolate to me is Hershey's and nothing but! However, I did enjoy this treat. I don't think I would buy a bunch of the milk chocolate ones, but I could see myself going after the other varieties, such as caramel.
Cheesy grins for everyone!

  • Vitabath Hydrating Lotion - I wasn't one of the luck Influencers to receive this product. 
I hope I continue to have the privilege of testing products. If you have any questions about Influenster or the products above, please don't hesitate to ask! I don't mind talking about my experience. :)

I received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes.
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Monday, November 4, 2013

Careers in Student Affairs Month

[Originally written for 11/1/13] 
Last night/this morning on Facebook Ann Marie Klotz posted a question on her timeline.As I was typing my response I decided to delete all I had written and responded with: "I think I'll blog my answer". So here it is.

So what was the question? 

My answer doesn't just name a person, like most others who had commented. My answer is a much longer story than a name. See, I'm a first generation college student. All I knew about college was what I had seen through the eyes of Hollywood and heard from people at school. I had no idea what I had gotten myself into. When I applied for college I had applied to two, just two: Cedar Crest College in Allentown, Pennsylvania and Franklin Pierce University in Rindge, NH. Why two? Well as most people know each college requires an application fee. I was not just a first generation college student, but I was also a first generation college student from a one parent household living in the economical lower class. I couldn't afford to apply to all the colleges that I wanted to. I applied to CCC because if I had gone to their Open House the application fee was waived. I applied to FPU because at the time they had a free application. I was accepted to FPU and was informed by my Guidance Counselor that the financial aid package was pretty good; knowing nothing about that I enrolled and graduated with my BA in Social Work and Counseling.

What does this have to do with my start in Student Affairs? Everything.

I picked up my life and moved from Pennsylvania to New Hampshire to attend college. I knew no one where I was going. The only thing I had in mind was to get my degree, graduate, and get a job. During move-in was my first encounter with Student Affairs. My mother and her significant other drove me to college in our truck, the back filled with boxes because my mother made me take way too much stuff. (Yes we were THAT family.) We followed Campus Safety's directions and parked in a space outside my building, before I was able to get out of the truck we were surrounded by what seemed like hundreds of people in blue shirts. Someone greeted me and asked where I lived. I showed them the folder I had received at the entrance of campus. They brought me to the check-in table outside of my residence hall and I was given my room key. I was then brought to my room, looking behind me trying to figure out where my mother had gone and wondering how I'm going to move my items up so many stairs. I met my roommate who had moved in early due to field hockey pre-season. I said hello and walked inside the room to see person after person bringing in all of my items and placing them in my room or outside in the hall. I moved in NOTHING! I just had it all to unpack though. The day went on with some convocation items, a mandatory floor meeting in which I first met my Resident Assistant, and a welcome carnival. My mother left during convocation. I was alone to set up my side of the room. I was in my room alone with the door opened when two girls came by asking why I wasn't at the welcome carnival. I really didn't feel like going (yep, I was THAT resident), but they convinced me to check it out so I did. I'm not going to lie and say that this was the moment that did it for me, it wasn't. It took me a while to figure it out.

Later in the semester I saw posters around the hall looking for applicants to be Resident Assistants for mid-year hires. I told myself it was too early to apply as I hadn't finished a semester there myself, but that I would for the following year. At that time I had really connected with two of the RAs in my building and the Experience Director (Hall Director/Residence Director/etc). I found myself in the RA office while they were on duty most of the nights. I then became THAT resident. I never really connected with my own RA though. She was a senior and I didn't see her around much. When she was, she was interacting with the popular girls on the floor. I tried to bridge the community and made some great friends on the entire floor. Although I was nice to them all, there were some who I was not fond of. My roommate became friends with those girls, and one night in November my roommate and a group of the girls who I didn't particularly care for were in my room  gossiping and speaking poorly of many of the other girls on the floor. I felt entirely uncomfortable even siting at my desk witnessing this. Luckily some of the girls I had met in the building invited me to go bowling (side note: bowling in New England is not traditional ten pin bowling - it's Candle Pin bowling and I'm sure the locals got a kick out of seeing two girls from Pennsylvania and one from New Jersey trying to figure it out!) While I was out, unbeknownst to me, the girls in my room went through my things, put on my undergarments and took pictures of themselves. I found out a few days later when one of my friends on the floor had found the photos in her room (her roommate was involved). I went to my Experience Director's office and asked for a room change. At that point in time anyone who had an opening was not willing to welcome someone new into their space as they had a double as a single. I didn't want to be in a worse situation so I didn't pry too much when girls told me no. I was lucky to find an opening in a triple on a different floor in the building with an international student from Japan and a transfer student. I was happy to move and lucky to have some friends help me make the move too.

I found out later that my RA knew about it and didn't do anything because they were her friends. My new RA was a senior who had just gotten engaged so I never saw her either. I kept my relationships and connections with the other RAs in the building, and decided that I not only wanted to be a RA but I needed to be one. I needed to be a RA because residents needed someone who they could count on to help them, assist them, and be there for them. For the rest of my freshman year I became involved with Res Life, applied for a RA job in the spring and was offered a position for the next year. I was a RA for one year and a Head RA for a second year. During those years I participated in RLAGS, a NH based Residence Life conference, and did what I could to go above and beyond. I knew at that time that I wanted to make a career in Residence Life. When I was asked why I became a RA, I didn't shy away from the truth: I became a RA because my experiences with RAs were horrible. I became a RA because I didn't want other students going through the difficult transition that I had gone through. As with most things in my life, I do them because I have seen the bad and want to make things better for others so they don't have to go through it.

Who encouraged me to enter the field? I did. Me. Myself. I.

However, there are some really great professionals I have met who have kept me in the field. A huge thank you to those who've been there when I needed some guidance, assistance, or just someone to hash out an idea with. Here are some of them, just to name a few, (i.e. the big ticket winners, who at times I'm not sure I would know what to do without them): 
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Saturday, August 3, 2013

Achievement Unlocked: Survive Week 1

I did it. I packed up my life and moved 556.5 miles to a new beginning.

 I decided to record some thoughts about my first week. Some days were busier than others. Some days were better than others. However, in the grand scheme of things it really was a good week. I'm very happy being able to participate in professional staff training before RAs arrive. It's important and more institutions need to make sure they are doing what they can to offer professionals this kind of opportunity.

 First Day:


  • Overwhelmed by benefit information. Amazed by how Facilities Management operates and the opportunities that allow for input on my building/area. More intense items seem to be coming next week. Eek!


Second Day:


  • No one told me the morning sessions time had changed, I was 30 minutes late. The session covered an introduction to our department of Campus Living for new staff. Luckily they didn't mind waiting. Afterward I went with two new colleagues to the Student Union as I had not been before and had Moe's for lunch. Which I have  never had, but it was good. No Chipotle, but it works. The day finished with learning about the Keys System and BASIS which is the card access system UB uses. I enjoyed knowing that I didn't have to actually scan a card to reprogram it! I'm excited for the new technology.


 Third Day:


  • Started the day with a session for an introduction to Judicial Affairs. I then returned to campus and worked on my expectations for my Assistant Hall Director and separate expectation lists for RAs during training and the upcoming year.  I had an Area Meeting, which consisted of speaking with my supervisor and colleague about things for the year. I look forward to these meetings as I'm able to get a lot of questions answered and a better understanding on certain topics. I finished the day with an ice cream social and local Trivia Night with colleagues. 
  • Overall a success.


Fourth Day:


  • Assistant Hall Directors arrived last night. Today they joined us for training. I was in my office early, still trying to figure out a new layout for my desk. The other night when I had tried it almost ended in an anxiety attack. I think I've figured it out - now just to get help moving furniture. I met with my AHD to discuss layout and then we both joined the rest of the Area for a staff meeting. Afterward we headed to North campus for lunch to rejoin the rest of the RHD/AHD staff for training. Coming from a staff of two it's crazy to see so many professionals in training sessions. 
  • Residential Education Curriculum. Intense, but excited to learn!


 Fifth Day:


  • Sustainability - we have a solar panel grid on campus and we compost! This is awesome.
  • Budgeting - I love this part of the job. I can't wait to configure my excel workbooks for the semester/year and work with the Budget Office on handling purchases.
  • Community Development and Paraprofessional Programming Model - lots of new stuff. Lots of things I need to remember and get acquainted with, but nothing too far fetched that I won't be able to accomplish. Also, the interactive presentation for the programming model was a nice change up.
  • Sessions ran long, but they were interactive and enjoyable. A lot of information to go over in a short period of time. The staff have done great in presenting material.



Final thoughts: Bring on week 2!
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Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Now that it's official

Photo courtesy of HigherEdJobs.com
As some of my readers (Do I actually have readers?) are aware I have been a Resident Director at Southern Maine Community College since February 2011. I looked at this opportunity to expand my scope of expertise, to gain experience in the public sector, and to explore a new city. All of which I believe I have been able to accomplish. In doing so I have also dealt with some personal struggles that pulled on my heart strings to be closer to my family.
After a long few months of applying and interviewing I have completed another job search. The result of this is that I will be leaving my current position on Friday, July 26, 2013. I have been offered and accepted a position at the University at Buffalo in Buffalo, NY. I am excited for this transition and the new journey I am about to begin. 
Photo courtesy of buffalo.edu

 Reflecting back on my experiences while at SMCC is bittersweet. I enjoyed having the chance to teach, learn, and grow with my staff, residents, and colleagues. Being here has been filled with a lot of growth for me as a professional and I have enjoyed that. I am going to miss the students; those who I have helped, those who I have pushed academically and socially, and those who I may not have had the opportunity of working with. I appreciate the students I had the opportunity of sharing Spring Point Hall with and wish them all the best of luck. 
Reflecting back on my experiences while at SMCC is bittersweet. I enjoyed having the chance to teach, learn, and grow with my staff, residents, and colleagues. Being here has been filled with a lot of growth for me as a professional and I have enjoyed that. I am going to miss the students; those who I have helped, those who I have pushed academically and socially, and those who I may not have had the opportunity of working with. I appreciate the students I had the opportunity of sharing Spring Point Hall with and wish them all the best of luck. 

Sightseeing:
Eateries:

Thank you. 


Overall the past 2.5 years has been a great adventure. I was able to continue with my career and explore a new location. I may not have fallen completely head over heels for Maine, but it did offer some good things. If you are ever in the area and want to indulge in some of it's gems, check out these places:



I look forward to joining a new staff and continuing to grow and develop as a professional. I'm also excited to meet new students. I entered my career in Higher Education because I wanted to make a difference, either big or small. I wanted to be someone that a lost, confused, or even completely put together student may need. I wanted to be someone that I needed when I was applying to college. I still want to be that person. I think most of my drive and passion for the field comes from my own experience - the good and bad - when I was a college student. It's not easy work. At times it's a very thankless position, but one I don't think I could see myself not doing.




As a chapter closes, a new one is being written.
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Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Quality of Life: Live-In Staff [Pets]

[UPDATE: 3/21/14] So I originally posted this almost a year ago, and it's funny what a year can change. I switched positions but am still at an institution that does not allow professional staff to own pets, other than fish. With my new position I moved closer to home. I have been able to go home a little more often than I had been able to while I was living so far away. This was a nice change. I enjoyed being able to go home and spend time with our dogs. But, what does this have to do with an update?
Well, unfortunately over the past few months my dog that I have had since I was 15 began to have health problems. My mom called me earlier this month saying that they may have to put him down. I checked in after I knew they had brought him to the vet and it seemed like with medication he was getting better. Then, out of the blue two weeks after he was at the vet my dog died at home. I was notified around 10:00 p.m. the night that it happened. For some this might not seem like a big deal, but for me it was. My dog was part of my life for thirteen years. He was my dog through most of my adolescence, and well for anyone who has been through adolescence you know how important those relationships are to you. I took some time off last week to go home, say goodbye, and spend time with our other dog (technically my sister's dog). Having animals around is important to me, and I've realized that this has become a more important issue to not only my professional life but also my personal life. I'm an advocate for allowing live-in professionals the opportunity to have pets on campus. I believe I'm more of an advocate now than I was before. I don't think institutions should just have a "no, never, don't even ask" mindset. They need to be able to allow professionals to make a case and then decide. Maybe all hall apartments aren't set up for a pet policy, but what if you had some options on campus?

RIP 3/10/14 Sid


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Growing up do you remember when you received your first pet?
Do you remember when you first asked, begged, and pleaded with your parents to get you a pet?


It may seem like such a long time ago, but for me I remember most of it clearly. I didn't beg, plead, or ask for a pet my Mom just got them for us. When I was very little we first had a fish tank. I remember because I used to sit down in our living room for hours watching the fish swim around. I'm not sure what happened to the fish tank, but then we got a bird. I remember the bird because one night during summer someone forgot to shut a window, the temperature dropped, and the bird died in it's cage. I remember burying the bird beneath a tree in our backyard. After that it was a few years before we got another pet. The next pet was a cat from a local farm. It was white with orange-ish brown spots. I named her St. Aloysius (it was the church next door and one I had attended my entire life). I grew up with her for most of my childhood. She was an indoor-outdoor cat, and I was there when she had kittens which then we took care of them too. After St. Aloyusis died we got a dog and named him Buddy. Since, we've had other cats and dogs, but also gerbils, fish, and a mouse.

When I moved away for college I owned fish and during breaks I'd go home to the two English Setters we got my Sophomore year of High School. I have only ever been without pets since I became a professional. So what does this have anything to do with? Well, in my previous positions I was close enough to home to still feel like I owned pets. I'd visit the house, play with the two dogs, and things would be fine. However, now that I currently live ten hours from home, I don't get that luxury. Sure, I could have fish - but who wants to pet a fish? Who wants to curl up on a rainy day reading a book on the couch with a fish in your lap? There are just too many things that fish can't do to make them a worthwhile pet now.

As an adult, I am able to purchase a pet and provide for it. However, because of my chosen career I am either limited in this ability or it's stripped from me altogether. I understand that there are arguments on both ends for live-in professionals to have pets. Although it seems that some of the arguments against are frivolous  "What will the residents say? The residents can't have pets." Yes, the residents can't have pets. Are the residents employees of the institution? Employees have different rights and expectations than consumers/customers - this works in all venues.

I haven't done an official poll, but I have asked a few other live-in professionals about this and the ones who are allowed to own pets are much more interested in staying with their institution, are happier at work, and feel more like a professional than just a glorified student. If we are trying to provide the best experience to our students and hire the most qualified individuals; should we not invest in making sure they are going to want to stay? What about modeling good behavior? Being responsible? Pet owners have good time management skills, are reliable, innovative, and caring; so why wouldn't student affairs be interested in keeping people with these skills. It seems that there's more disservice done than good in having policies against pet ownership.
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Thursday, February 21, 2013

Quality of Life: Live-In Staff [Live-in Partners]

In increasing numbers states are passing new legislation that is making marriage possible for all, no matter the individuals identified gender. How does this affect Higher Education?

Since I started as a professional I have been single. It's never been a question during interviews whether or not the institution offers professionals with the opportunity to have another adult live with them. As an undergraduate I saw the live-in professionals with their significant others or spouses and never questioned it. Why would I? Why would I think that adults would not be able to live with someone that they loved and had committed to?

I never really paid attention to it. I wasn't interested in falling in love and starting that "next chapter" of my life. I wanted to get an education. I wanted to find a job. I wanted a career.

Now as I close in on the end of my twenties and start seeing friends and relatives my age begin to "settle down", I think about these things a little more. I'm more aware of relationships. I'm also more aware that just because you are seen as a responsible adult, that doesn't mean that in your career you can always have the traditional/common luxuries that everyone else does.

As a live-in professional there are three types of situations, or at least there are three that I can identify:
  • Married
  • Engaged/Long-term commitment
  • Dating/Long-term commitment
Let's discuss these a little closer:

Married:
  • You've done it! You tied the knot. You started the next chapter. You're in it for the long haul. You're committed...or one of the many other common sayings about marriage. Congratulations! I have not come across an institution that denies a married professional from living in a residence hall on campus. I haven't really searched either, but I find that there'd be a whole lot of legal mess if they didn't allow it. So you can live with your significant other, you can do your job, you can continue with your career.
Engaged/Long-term commitment:
  • You met someone. You fell in love. You've both chosen each other as "the one". Congratulations! Though just because you have committed to each other, it doesn't mean institutions have to recognize that and allow for you to live in a residence hall together. It is a little more common now because there is no Federal law allowing equal marriage rights to everyone...[yet], and not all states have passed their own laws yet. However, it may take a little bit of searching, if you are, for a new position that the new institution would have a policy for it.
Dating/Long-term commitment:
  • You met someone. You fell in love. You both may or may not have chosen each other as "the one". You are committed to each other, but may not be ready for engagement or marriage. Maybe you don't want to get married? I believe this is where it gets even more difficult. Institutions in states that have not passed marriage equality laws may still have domestic partner policies or live-in partner policies, but I have found less and less of those.
As a profession do we not talk about modeling good behaviors? Do we not discuss being good role models? Why is it that if someone is good enough to be hired and trusted as a live-in/live-on professional whose responsibility it is to make sound and rationale decisions is it then not allowed for them to be trusted to choose a quality live-in partner? If our professional life decisions are acceptable, why aren't our personal life decisions?

Before, the hot topic was work/life balance, but now people are talking about work/life integration. Do people forget about live-in professionals when they come up with these things? I love what I do. I love living in the residence hall and being a part of the community. I love the after hours conversations that I have with students. I love that there are times when they tell you that you've made a difference - maybe just in their day, week, month, year, but sometimes it's in their entire life. A small thank you speaks volumes to me. I love what I do. I'm not ready to quit. I don't want to quit. But I'm also not ready to move on from my current level of profession. Although I have five years of experience as a entry-level Resident Director, I don't believe it's the same experience as an entry-level RD at a large institution. My background is primarily at small private liberal arts colleges - which I've loved, don't get me wrong - but I don't have the experience of dealing with a paraprofessional staff of more than eight Resident Assistants. I don't have the experience of supervising a Graduate Assistant. I don't feel I would be prepared for an Assistant Director role. Could I do it? I believe so. I just don't believe the overall quality would be great. I don't want to put out poor quality stuff!

So here I am; at the end of my 20's, recent graduate of a Master's program, trying to navigate my next move. Where do I go from here? I haven't exactly figured that one out yet, but I do know - even as a single woman - that in my next position I want to know that I have the option of having someone I love live with me. I want to know that if I find someone, I don't have to wait. I want to know that I can have a career and I can have a personal life. Why must that include marriage? What if I don't want to get married? What if I don't believe in it? Maybe I don't. Maybe I do, but why should I feel that I'm forced into it? I'm aware I will have limited options, but I don't believe it should be that way. The field is growing at a steady rate, if I don't like the terms of one position someone else will. Someone else who may be younger. Someone else who may not care, as I once did. 

What, as professionals, are we saying about our field if we put so many limits on professionals? I am not advocating that I can turn my on campus apartment into a revolving door of possible suitors. I however am advocating that institutions take a closer look at their policies. Maybe they should look at what they present from a would-be candidates eyes. If you had to do it over again, would you want to work there? Would you be able to  live alone? Would you want to?
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